vibrating visions of the perilous kind
felt the marks you left in time
wind me up and watch me spin
throw in a smile for Lucky to win

If I were a ship
and you the sea,
I’d let your swells
unravel me.
Nails pulling from
my wise oak skin.
Feeling your liquid limbs
wash through me within.
Eventually, forever.
Tangled together
as opposites can, & do.
Content now for always
to let me float among you.

Blue eyes blink slow
her brow furrows
what is it that she can’t know..

bring your eyes down
I can’t even look at you now
suffered me enough
through every goddamn late night cry
you’ve crippled me for the last time.

my brain swims
in a sultry combination
of plasma and the whims
we never filled
doesn’t it thrill you to know
all my crops died in the snow
last winter when I held you
like nothing mattered before

I smelled the sick reek of truth decay
the worst cavity to fill
four out of five broken hearts would say

I climbed inside your life
reaching for a strength I never grew
a strange strength I saw in you
the limits of my hope
my trust
my care
my doubt
my suspicion
my disgust
my need
saw no end
I know we can’t be friends.

the
truth
is
I
DID
watch
you
die
that
night

in my eyes. Now there is no light.

all those songs
I can’t hear
without goosebumps
crawling under my skin

“We are heavy, oh so heavy.”

your voice I will never hear again
those mornings I will never live again

not your baby
because I was his
& I don’t think that I was
or ever will be
really over this

Why can’t you just be…
whatever I did to you
I did worse to me

I know you hurt
I know you cried
but we cannot reconcile
by living in a lie

one day I’m just hoping you realize
you knew me better than that
I always felt as a child in your eyes
& I never had any guts to lie

“The pins & needles sing.”

I swear I’m yours to keep
because you couldn’t have kept me

Chip: I’d very much enjoy it if you stayed out of my business and never spoke to me again. We made a deal. I want my belt and book.

Me: Hahaha whatever dude.

Chip: Go fuck yourself.

Me: Chip, you’ve fucked me over enough for a lifetime. And you should realize that we will never be able to leave each other alone. My sex wasn’t your business either, especially since I had much less of it than you think I did.

Chip: And I don’t care, bitch.

Me: Haha Sangster taught you to hate me, which is fine. You shouldn’t be so quick to throw someone to the dogs when you have a little bark yourself. Makes you look like a hypocrite (:

Chip: And you’re a lying bitch and I want my shit back.

Me: Haha we both lie. You won’t get your shit back my dear, that’s a promise ! (: Unless, of course, you morph back from this rat bastard that you are now, into the nice boy everyone loved.

“You da fuckin’ best.”

what I need
& you know
just how to hold me

sweeping me up
a child on a swing

I stole you away
in spite of everything

“Tha best I eva had.”

I strive for your smile
lifting me up
over your head
the perfect little while

“Who told you to put them jeans on ?”

you, my dear
I’d wear the stars for you
much like I wear this grin
less wicked under your whim

watch the wind escape my lungs
I know it’s not just for fun
not with these dreams
laying doubt in me

but if I can breathe
then why not sing

my lungs stay full
& I stay okay
almost as whole
as when you steal me away

as much as my tide pulled at you
gravity pulled vanity just like the moon
I can’t think straight anyway
I can’t be straightaway

when you disappear
I have everything to fear

Above the crest,
an auburn dawn.
Hand through the rest,
stiffling a yawn.

Quite the white sea,
staring back at me.

Six feet to the left,
curled in a seat.
Working on the bereft
words & styles of defeat.

Anxiety for the clock’s final freeing tick,
from the mathematics to make the mathematician sick.

Back to my daunting ocean,
doodles not functions.
Fleeting curious notions
about a boy with secret gumption.

Maybe it’s just lately,
but this notion’s got me shaking.

I miss you,
like crazy.

Bestfriend’s a lie,
not that you’d tell it tonight.

If I somehow upset you,
just know I won’t forget you.

It crushes my chest
to watch what I called best,
slide away
as ice on a warm day.

I apologize for talking too much,
for using you as my only crutch.
I didn’t mean the harm I caused,
if you had let on, I would’ve paused.

Now I feel it’s all my fault,
heavily opposite of exalt.

Or perhaps I bored you,
your smile gone slack.
Crossed one-too-many lines,
the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Whatever happened,
it makes my chest heavy to say-
You’re truely the only one I miss
at the end of the day.

Fingers stiff
Toes the same
At least your body
Can’t feel this pain

Left behind
The wake of heart
Mere vacant breath
Keeps you apart

I didn’t know you
Now I will never
But I’m left to tend
The lives you severed

Threaten my smile,
& I’ll show you the claws.
Don’t tempt me to prove
that I can break the law.

Who wakes up,
his sweet lips to her ear ?
I do, so fuck you.
I’m the one that the killers fear.

You’re frantically digging
your very own grave.
You’ll soon wish you were at the bottom,
given the mistakes you’ll wish you never made.

Toying with me,
is toying with your organs.
So step the fuck off,
or I’d be happy to rearrange them.

He’s new
just the like the relationship between you

My trust was never anything to brag of
Any negativity sends me reeling, backing up

In light of such
I can’t seem to trust you as much
As I trust him
with every breath, beat, & whim

I smell a serpent
among rodents
Pacify the cry
with venom for them

Disheveled I may be
but closed eyes do not mean I can’t see

A simple seesaw of emotion
all I needed was unhindered devotion

& I swear if you take this from me
bloody scales shall litter the sea

It’s a promise
not a threat